Robbie & Max and a brush with Tesco

Robbie came over for lunch today. Robbie is a very dear friend of Max. They’ve know each other since they were young. Rebecca, Robbie’s mum and I hit it off immediately and she’s been a priceless close friend ever since. Robbie and Max have a slow growing relationship which has picked up pace in the last few years to the point where they get on very well indeed and adore each other. They are united by West Ham, Wrestling and toilet talk. They make a great team and resemble Laurel & Hardy, Max being dark haired, relatively short and dumpy and Robbie being blond, tall and thin. Robbie has DS too.

They don’t go to the same school, but meet each week at their favourite dance class and get together when possible. Max has even been to a sleep-over at Robbie’s which he loved and I suspect, on his return home, he would have cheerfully packed his bags and turned back around to move in with The Cahill family. Sadly we haven’t achieved a return sleep-over as Robbie is terrified of cats – we have three.

After Robbie had unceremoniously got rid of his mum (no chance for a quick cuppa) the two lads quickly fell into a comfortable rhythm, going through all of Max’s Wii games selecting their favourites and generally organising themselves. I was told to ‘push off’ out of the front room which I share with Max (we both have ‘work desks’ in there!) It was a delight to hear them chatter together, chuckling and giggling over things that they both found highly amusing. They are both on a very similar wave length and just get on really well. I bless the angels for that. We all crave a mate in this world and to find such a pal when you have the added complication of DS is a challenge. Rebecca and I have never pushed them together; they’ve just discovered each other over time, the best way.
I was impressed that it wasn’t until one o’clock that Robbie and Max appeared at the kitchen door asking about lunch. Nothing normally gets in the way of Max and his food. He struggles with telling the time, but bang on twelve noon you can guarantee that he’ll be striding towards the fridge with an egg mayonnaise sandwich in mind. I let them dig about in the fridge to see what we had. Max predictably couldn’t be persuaded away from the egg mayo, even though Robbie introduced a new idea of bacon & ketchup. With a bit of help both boys were soon sat in the conservatory with their lunch, happily chatting about big bottoms and dogs.

Before they were settled, an alarming topic came up. While they were discussing what they’d like for pudding they both said they'd like to go over to Tesco (we live over the road from a store) to get some ice cream BY THEMSELVES! I thought I disguised clutching my chest and inhaling deeply rather well, and quickly rallied back with a sharp little reply of
‘Well, let’s see how you feel later.’
They had so much food that I was confident that they would not need the ice cream and therefore wouldn’t think about the visit. I had no idea what Rebecca would think about the situation and had no desire to rush her into a decision she may be uncomfortable with. But I did think it was something to consider. Imagine how chuffed both boys would be with themselves if they managed to get to Tesco, buy a tub of ice cream and return home? Robbie is extremely capable and Max has done the two minute walk so often he really does know where to go. He also spends a good deal of time in Tesco, so some staff would recognise him. Finding the ice-cream freezer may prove tricky and paying would be a challenge, but I know Max has done it with the school. Obviously doing it with the school is one thing and doing it alone with your mate, both having DS is quite another, but still.....

I know where this has come from, apart from a natural path of growing up and wanting to be independent, Max sees his brother Charlie beginning to do these small acts of bravery. Not alone, he’s not there yet (13) but when a mate comes over they pop to Tesco for unhealthy snacks or even get on the bus and go up to North Finchley to one of the coffee shops. That must be tough for Max to see and must get him thinking.
I would like nothing more than to let Max go over to the supermarket and enjoy some independence, I actually think he’s quite capable of it, it’s just everyone else that worries me. That’s not to say that I don’t think most people would be kind and respectful to him, it’s just that unknown one in a million that concerns me. Perhaps with a mate is the answer.

I haven’t talked to Rebecca about it yet and she understandably may feel it’s inappropriate right now. But one day I guess we both are going to have to take the plunge.
I can see it now; both in disguise, dressed in black from head to foot, perhaps even sunglasses. Connected by walkie talkies, stalking our teenagers, keeping a close watch Jack Bauer, 24 style. Rebecca could cover fruit and veg' and cold meats, I could cover non-perishables and household cleaning.
‘Come in breaker one, do you read me?’
‘Copy that breaker two. All clear.’
I think I may have a little chat with Rebecca at dance on Monday.